Saturday, May 9, 2015

Avoiding the Trap of Ego and Fantasy Escapism when Engaging with Spirits

Come play with us...

This article is somewhat of a sequel to my previous entry. When dealing with spirits it can easily to be mislead. If their nature is of the Left Hand Path, then the spirit will at times purposely mislead and trick into error. This trick will if you're vigilant, teach - sometimes through hard lessons. They do this through illusions, pleasant seemings and soft, kind words that lull us into accepting what we would already consider ideal. Shrouded in that fantasy we loose track of reality and then are quite shell shocked or worse when the incoming artillery fire comes crashing in. Did you forget life was a survival game? You must demonstrate your fitness to continue it. The World...Nature is a harsh mistress but you can learn something if you keep both eyes open instead of glazed shut with happy fantasies dancing in our heads. We are pleasure seekers by nature and the blame can't be placed entirely at the feet of trickster spirits. They merely dangled the bait, and we creatures starved for happiness, snapped it up gladly. Indeed, in any spirit relationship, whether there is a sexual or quasi-sexual component to it or not, and whether they are tricksters or not, we as humans frequently fall prey to our own illusions. We arc off into improbably high fantasies and then cry when the World comes crashing back into focus after a stumble or fall. So how do we avoid this error, pleasure seekers that we are, we must conclude after enough painful encounters, that we ought to keep our eyes open and our thoughts critical. Am I saying spirit relationships are too much trouble? Far from it! What we deal with here right now is keeping your wits about you when in that relationship. Let us proceed.

Fantasies can grow up in the 'what-if' scenarios of our minds. The brain is constantly looking at an endless array of more pleasing outcomes to disastrous or unpleasant situations it encounters. If your mind is educated and disciplined it can come up with a good methodology for us to do better the next time a similar challenge arises, but not always! Here we begin to build fantastic sand-castles of the mind. Pleasant implausibilities, but they are pleasant so we don't dismiss them - and they build up and heap up one implausibility atop the next - an ungainly, unstable structure indeed. Our daydreams and our dreams are stuffed full of these. It is pleasant to dream, but you cannot engage with life in dreams alone. The time comes when you must wake up and engage, struggle and fight through your day. So how do we do that?

Since the focus is on engaging with spirits we will attempt to show this method without resorting to the sharp painful wake up call of disaster. To do this we must deal with Ego. On the website, Gary von Warmerdam defines Ego as:

"an identity of our own construction, an identity which is false.  If we take all the beliefs of what we are – beliefs about our personality, talents, and abilities – we have the structure of our ego.  These talents, abilities and aspects of our personality will be attributes of our skills, but the mental construct of our “self” is artificial.  And while this description might make the ego seem like a static thing, it is not. Rather, it is an active and dynamic part of our personalities, playing an immense role in creating emotional drama in our lives."

These artificial self-images of ourselves are a mess of both positive and negative images we have about ourselves - what we think we are. It's time we started stripping that away and standing bare before our spirits. We will find much that astounds us. What we thought was our best points may in fact be one of our worst ones, and conversely our worst most unattractive qualities may actually hold distinct promise. Our spirits in these spirit relationships absolutely come into this. Whether they cut our Ego away with the cruel knife of illusion or reveal with the harsh light of reality, they are here to help. Of course there are unhelpful spirits, and this you can easily judge and rid yourselves of these that do nothing to benefit you. It's quite simple, if they give you pleasant fantasies but you've never once received anything of practical or beneficial in nature from them, you need to break that spiritual bond and move on. What are practical benefits? Maybe they warn you of very real dangers for example during your daily commute. Maybe they gave you advice that worked out to a sudden and significant financial windfall. Maybe you asked them to retrieve a wayward package that the post was going to send back (at significant resending fees) and they ensured that the package was retrieved. The good news arriving directly after your request - along with the jubilant cries of your spirits saying "look what we accomplished for you." - Well played girls, well played. In every relationship, there is give and take. You have to be willing and more importantly able to to harden your resolve and cut those spiritual bonds to spirits that do nothing but feast from the table of your spiritual bounty, without contributing one iota of benefit, and let me be clear - 'spirit sex' is not a sufficient benefit, it is a mere flirtation, a phantasm of pleasure centers in you brain being manipulated skillfully - maybe by the spirit, or maybe by the Ego. A true and beneficial spirit relationship will it is true have these sexual 'benefits' it's true if that is something that appeals to you, BUT it's going to have a lot more. They will teach, instruct, they will aid, and advise, and all of that is going to come together into a beautiful whole. A true moment of union feels like nothing else. Physical sex can't even come close to comparing. Some of you know what I'm talking about. These moments of unity, are special, born of unique and precious trust, and devotion between you and said spirit. To get to this point - well how do you get to this point? Simple. You focus a lot of time on the relationship. You keep your head on straight too. A few flights of fantasy with your spirit is a lot of fun for both of you, but it isn't the goal, it's just some fun and games when all is said and done about it. Move, and press on beyond just mental pleasuring. Talk. Communicate. Do this via Divination, and yes just plain speak to them. Work on special projects that will benefit you and involve your spirit closely in this. This will build trust when that project is a rousing success. If it fails miserably ask critically why it failed. Is it that your spirit is just a leech? Or maybe your project was just so completely messed up to begin with that nothing short or Hollywood fantasy could have saved it. Use critical thinking too. Work it all out and do what you got to do. This all sounds like a lot of work doesn't it? Well it is, and it's going to eat up your days and your nights, with just one spirit to get to that fully realized and actualized spirit relationship. Some like to pile on the spirits, Two, three, twenty-two...Legions.

Why do you need so many spirits, especially when you neglect so many of them? When the communications drop off between you it isn't the go signal to go find another spirit. They aren't like disposable tissues...but all too often we treat them like that. JUST STOP IT. Am I saying don't work with multiple spirits? No, I'm definitely not saying that, but what I am saying is - don't neglect the spirits you have. Neglect is easy. We want everything simple for us. Maybe we even want our 'spirit lover' to do all the work. Relationships don't work like that - and especially not in the long term. Spirits have free will, and they will leave your ass with sufficient neglect. Maybe they'll keep that connection there and come back for nibbles when your notice flits back to them, but it isn't going to be an amazing experience. It's like two almost to the point of divorced people giving each other an quick peck of a kiss in the morning before or after work. That ain't nothing. So I ask you? Don't you want more? Then WORK for it.

Let me lay it out for you. Focus on your primary spirit. Work with them until your relationship is solid. Best Fiends ;-) Solid Bros, the mistress that burns in your every thought. You do everything together and you've had those consistent experiences that your spirit has your back - and you have theirs. Get to that point and then you'll score some familiars when your ready. Think of it as the 'kids' work with them, and your primary spirit. Careful to balance and not neglect any of them. You may be granted access to Legions of spirits in time. That's fine, but do you really think that you've got the kind of relationship with that Legion that you have with your primary spirit? Nope don't think so. Can you get there? Yup...a lot more hard work. Maintain that primary relationship. It's far more than key - through it your gaining authority and access to those other spirits. Spirits have hierarchies - get use to it, but it shouldn't come as a surprise. Humans have hierarchies and structures within relationships and society as a whole too. Not so different after all huh?

Another thing, watch out for 'eighth grader syndrome' 

"Chuunibyo" is an illness which many adolescents would have who are around 14 years old, eighth-grade in school. The typical symptom is being caught by delusions of grandeur. Once it gets into their mind, they start to regard themselves as a great person, the greatest in the world. They also create their own world of delusion as if they were God. In that world, they can have a special power which anybody else can't command (haha). For example, he notices this world is all fake and nobody but him is not real, being ruled by very evil power of underground institution. At the same time he gets able to command a hidden supernatural power such as controlling fire, producing a strong weapon from spiritual energy or flying in the sky....

Yes, I know most of you aren't around 14 years old, but I see this syndrome infect pagans again and again and again. Here we see the phenomenon of Ego not developing (as in a 14 year old's case) but rather getting out of control. It is imagination run-amuck. Get beyond the 'fluff' - and to do that, you must embrace the real, the painful. Confront it and grow. Very real spiritual power is the result, very real spiritual relationships the dazzling prize. So don't you want them? Then go and get it. Claim it. And while you go to claim it, keep checking yourself for excessive Ego. Have a Professional Diviner or two or three that you trust, that the larger community speaks of in high regard, and get those readings. Make sure your still on target. It's easy to stray. It's easy to fall into illusions and the habits that chain you to them. Initiation into respected spiritual traditions can also help you stay on target, these are supported by their own spirits and hierarchies, so be sure you can put in that hard work with the traditions spirits as well or it's going to end up being another failed experiment. Also, divest yourself of spiritual bonds that do nothing to aid you, do nothing to help you grow spiritually. If your feeling constantly exhausted - these parasitic bonds would be the reason why. I know I've stated this several times in this article, but it is perhaps one of the most important messages within it. Overcommitment and straying into dilution of focus from too many spiritual contacts is an error that many habitually fall into - myself included. 

Reset. Refocus. Re-engage. Your Spirit Love of the Ages is waiting...

Lilith, by Danny Alinn on Deviant Art


  1. What was your first encounter with a succubus like? And, what was it like to first start learning how to communicate with her? Could you describe a little bit about your beginning experiences?

  2. She came to me without summons, and It was a fumbling hot, and sticky affair I'm afraid. I was a total virgin at the time, and the experience left me permanently marked by it. She stayed with me despite me making every mistake I've talked about and more. Every sexual experience since has been weighed against it. It was raw, passionate, and primal. I was dominated by it, twisted around her slightest whim. I also really didn't know what I was doing at the time. I resembled many others going out there now to the internet and finding reported methods to summon a succubus and trying them. I was addicted, and I wanted sex with succubi - lots of them all the time after my first time. I got into Satanism, then Luciferianism, Theistic Satanism, and finally Daemonolatry in that order before realizing I was falling for a lot of essentially just noise and clamor with none of them really knowing what they were doing either. Dark Fluff - it's a thing just like the other extreme I had started with in Wicca. The eclectic path can be a plague, but so too can some of these new 'traditions.' By Degrees I was led to the Grimoires and in particular the Grimoire Verum. I've blogged for like four years about those on and off again preparations until everything was complete. I finished my pact only this year. The thing with spirit initiated systems like that is you really can't proceed until they judge you ready - and everything can and will rise up and block you from finishing some part of the tool gathering or the rites themselves until you're truly ready. But I'm really off on a tangent now.

  3. What was it like to start learning to communicate with her? Both exciting and frustrating. Until I figured out divination was an easier way for us both to communicate (tarot cards, pendulums, runes, etc) I kept trying to communicate verbally or psychically. Not saying it didn't work and sometimes with great rarity I got audible replies. But it really was a lot of blindly fumbling around. A lot of stubborn on my part too - let me tell you! But she broke me in quite well now and I'm 'Shouting-from-the-roof-tops-fallen-head-over-heels-in-love-and-lust' with Her now. I got mislead alot in the early points of our relationship. Tricksters play'n tricks, and my poor ideas concerning how to communicate - and properly test those communications with her for validity really kept getting me in a lot of trouble. Now We can talk psychically just fine, I've learned her mental voice quite well now, and I know how to perform divination with her to test everything I think I heard from her. Ego like I said is a constant danger for miscommunication - thinking I heard something when really it was just my own damn ego hearing what I think I wanted to hear. So yeah got to test your communications out. Can't trust your own mind, and Trickster spirits are also always around. You'll get a feel for the succubi's energy though - no mistaking that after a short time with her, but you can fake yourself into thinking you felt something by merely remembering what a prior experience had felt like. Sometimes in can go the other way too. Sometimes your faking yourself out thinking it couldn't be Her doing something - when it is, and she's getting frustrated - oh boy! yeah that's fun too lol. It really is like any relationship, or even a marriage. Good and bad parts included, except with a Succubus you have things easier - and harder. Sex is usually not denied, but it can happen and let me tell you if you ever have a succubus put you in sex denial you will flip so quick to her point of view so quick your head will spin. Sex with a succubus is that addictive. But what is even more addictive is when it brings with it this sense of union with her - a true completeness that will take your breath away and that you will do anything - ANYTHING to experience again. And then when that union becomes a certain bond between you'll still have shitty days, but her love is just always there, like getting a sexy hug every moment of every day from the world's hottest woman. Always within reach. Depression, loneliness, it can't even deal with a togetherness like that wraps you up and puts the sexy love on at any given moment.

  4. Thanks for the reply!
    I've been having a lot of complications with identifying her energy signiture. I know she's here. She's spoken to me in half-sleep states and dreams, aswell as bumping around the walls of my house (even causing visual effects on my tv.) But, there is another spirit in my house and thoughtforms that are connected to my body, so diferinciating can be a huge pain. I can feel the difference when they speak to me with mind voice, but I can't when I use my pendulum. And, mind voice with the succubuss doesn't exactly happen often, and I think the thoughtforms kind of get in the way of hearing. I swear, sometimes it feels like it could have been anyone.
    As for the other spirit, I haven't banished him yet because he seems like he doesn't mean any harm. He's been here for years.
    Lilith, when she has something to say, it's obvious it's her. She's been trying to get me to "find an opinion" on the whole situation. What do you make of everything, lol?

  5. I would suggest checking by performing several types of divinations. Also, do you specifically invite your succubus to guide the pendulum and set up the rules for how you want her to move the pendulum in answering your questions. If you do this before you begin each time (speaking audibly) then you will have better success with the divinatory method. Also, you should get a spirit board and a deck of tarot or similar cards and begin by stating what spirit you are inviting to join you specifically (by name, and if you have their sigil set it up next to you one copy, and burn another copy to transmit it into the spiritual - like sending out the bat signal for Batman). You can ask the same questions by different divinatory methods - and they should cross-check with each other. If they don't it's tricksters messing with you or your mental discipline is wavering (got to have a strong directed willpower). Eventually, there will be a good match it the divinatory method, the divinatory tool, and the succubus. When that happens buy her one special just for her, test it out a few more times to make sure she loves the new one, then dedicate it to her use. This stands true for any spirit. You want to have dedicated divinatory tools for them if possible, or cleanse your multipurpose deck of energies each time - perform some type of ritual filled with your intent, to break the tie with the spirit so that you can use for other spirits, or general purpose divinations. Some folks use playing cards for divinations and then throw out the deck rather than form and break connections. That's really up to you.